[18 Sep 2008|02:57pm] I cared about you more than I could ever explain.... I need to learn to say things out loud post comment

[21 Jul 2008|10:47am]  I'm moving to California in 3 weeks.  As excited as I am all I have been able to do is stress....daily i feel a panic attack coming on I'm making the right decision....right? post comment

[19 May 2008|12:59pm]  Nothing has changed.  I graduated college, got a real job, and wish I was a kid again. post comment

[31 Jan 2006|08:27pm] So I was sitting here feeling sick about the whole situation, it hasnt quite hit me that its all real yet, but it will tomorrow. I know Dave and I probably had one of the most messed up relationships 2 people could have. We used each other, we treated each other like shit, but in the end we were still friends. Through it all we could still talk like we never did anything bad to each other. A week ago we got in a fight and made up all within a 5 minute conversation, thats what we did, we fought, we made up, and just had this love/hate relationship. For a long time I was a complete bitch to him, but he never let it get to him, we still talked and were friends. Last week after we talked i felt like things were finally fine between us that the past was the past well some of it, a few things stuck with me, but now its over. A part of me wishes I could go back to that conversation and tell him that things were okay with us, that I was sorry for what we had been through and what I had to tell him that day, but dont we all wish there was something we could have changed. I know I wasn't ever very close with him, but it still hits pretty hard. Everyone knew him and knew how he had an asshole personality, but we all knew there was a heart in there somewhere. It's weird to think about it, it makes me sick, I cant even imagine what he was really going through to come to this. We all wish we could have saved him, helped him, done anything to change what happened, but we can't. All I can say is that he will be missed by many. We all love you Dave and miss you more than you know. R.I.P. David Monkress you're in a much better place now post comment

I'm in serious need of roommates [11 Jan 2006|04:52pm] So I know I never update this thing anymore, but My roommates are moving out and I need to find 2 people to move into my house. If anyone is looking for a place to live or knows someone who might be, PLEASE LET ME KNOW!!!! you can either leave me a comment or email me(hotd59@hotmail.com) and I can give you more details If you help me out I will love you FOREVER! Seriously this is super important, so LET ME KNOW!!! <3 Dawn post comment

[05 Jul 2005|02:22pm] I wish I liked updating this thing like I used to, I mean I should love to, so much goes on in my life that I should talk about, but yet I find myself updating this thing once every couple months and when I do it, its only because I have nothing to do. Where to start....This summer has been pretty good. I love not living at home, my roommates are the best, we always manage to have a great time. Last weekend we drank for 4 straight days at our house and every nigth was interesting and fun in its own way. Hmmm...what else...o yeah I went to Orlando with the family. That was a pretty good time, got to go to the parks, lay in the sun and eat out everyday. Although the trip was fun it made me realize I would NEVER be able to move back home. Me living on my own, my mom and I have the best relationship, but being in a hotel and around her 24/7 all we did was fight. It was just nice to get away from here for awhile though. Theres still no boy in my life, but I'm okay with that. I would much rather just worry about having fun than worry about finding a boy. I mean I still alwyas have that one for when I need someone haha! I scheduled my fall classes the other day and its coming up soon, So I plan on having as much fun as possible for the next month or 2. o yea and 2 weeks ago I got my lip pierced, I went with ash and jess to get their noses pierced and well when I get there I always want something, so i did it and I like it. post comment

[18 May 2005|09:17pm] So, last night was probably, no wait...it was one of the funnest nights I've had in a long time. Shannon and I went to a gay bar/strip club with a bunch people she works with. I've decided I LOVE GAY GUYS! I also decided gay bars are way better than straight bars, they are my new favorite thing to do. 1 comment|post comment

[15 May 2005|07:12pm] I just typed a whole entry, reread it and realized I need to move on in my life, so, so much for that update it was nothing worth reading! One quick update though, the hoedown was this weekend and last night we went and had a good time of course then drank over here and had sex talk....good times with my bests. I love them! post comment

[24 Apr 2005|02:54pm] Wow what the hell went on this weekend! My birthday was thursday so of course lots of celebrating when on....A LOT of celebrating with A LOT of alcohol! Friday got trashed went to club divine, pole danced met a stripper Last night wow it was way outta hand! I finally used my fake id and it worked with no problems whatsoever! So we start drinking here, first its a few drinking games with some absolut vanilla and root beer...then I moved onto beer...next thing you know were playing beer pong...then outta no where we got ambushed by my brother! At this point I'm already pretty drunk, but we get to another party and start playing more beer pong..well we ended up playing quite a few games...then thank god we lost cuz i was beyond wasted! Ashleigh falls down the stairs then we decide to go home. Ryan ATTEMPTS to drive us, gets us lost on what should have been a 5 minute drive. We finally get home I feel like I'm gonna puke so I sit down on the wet porch in the freezing cold...and pass out with my fifth in my hand! I realize my ass is all wet so I go inside and end up passing out in the hallway, I guess the stairs to my room just seemed like too much trouble. I eventually made it up to my room and I wake up today feeling like shit! What the hell? But u know it was definitely a good weekend and I heart my roommates! 1 comment|post comment

[21 Apr 2005|12:24pm] Just so everyone knows....I'm happy and..... TODAY IS MY BIRTHDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! post comment

[06 Apr 2005|11:13pm] I hate my life right now...I cant see anyone wanting this life. Yeah its spring and now I'm not happy..what the hell I love spring...I love the fact that I can go outside without my shoes on, drive around with the windows down and the music blasting, wear t-shirts and skirts, be outside for hours and never want to go in....so why when all the things I love are beginning to happen am I unhappy? God I wish I knew...this week though Ive just been in such a crappy mood. Maybe its this stupid cycle I have going in my life right now...school, work, school, and more work....I feel like I dont have a life outside of that...I want to just have fun...quit my jobs...pay for nothing and have a carefree life but that will NEVER happen, So I need to get over it. Maybe when school gets done in 3 weeks things will be better..at least then it will only be work. Okay well I'm done bitching about my shitty life...I'm not getting let it get me down...its spring time and soon enough it will be summer and I will make sure this one is amazing! post comment

[09 Mar 2005|11:47pm] Well I've unfortunately been back from California for almost a week now and well I miss it. I missed the semi-warm weather, the pretty drives, the ocean, the beach, and well just everything about being out there. But now im back to reality school has been stressful this week so I've decided I'm not gonna go tomorrow...Im just gonna sleep and get some things done before work. Speaking of work, I'm thinking about quitting Forever 21, I know Ive only been there for almost 4 months but we got a new manager who is freaking crazy and well I already dont like the job...so very soon Im gonna be on the hunt for something new taht does not involve clothing or the mall. well last saturday we decided to have a party since it was the end of spring break. Well it wasnt supposed to be very big..i didnt really tell neone about it, but it turned out to be alot bigger than expected....alot bigger. well there was a fight so i kicked a few people out and all was well. I got pretty drunk and was having a good time..met a boy and was talking to him most of the night then next thing i know another fight breaks out in the basement, this time its HUGE pretty much everyone in the basement is involved in it. It finally gets broke up and I was pissed at this point so i kicked everyone out. WAY TO RUIN MY NIGHT ASSHOLES! so I dont think were gonna be having any parties for awhile, I mean well occassionally do the, few people over drinking thing, but no more big parties for awhile cuz every time i just end up pissed off. other than the party nothing else exciting has happened. well just thought i would do a quick update! 1 comment|post comment

CALIFORNIA [02 Mar 2005|12:20pm] Right now I'm just hanging out in california...unfortunately tomorrow I have to come home to HORRIBLE michigan, I am in no way looking forward to it...well I do miss people...but thats the only reason I would wnat to be home...I honestly wish I could stay here, Ive had a ton of fun. We spent last weekend in L.A., Santa Monica, and Hollywood. I spent way too much money shopping...c'mon now though how can you go to the 3rd street promenade and Melrose Ave. and not spend money...plus at both locations there was a 3-floor urban...it was amazing! The weather hasnt been very hot, but its not snowing so thats all that matters to me. Weve taken 92384349834 billion pictures so when I get home Ill try to post some. Well just thought I would do a quick update while I was sitting here...Ill write more when I get home! post comment

[15 Feb 2005|11:15pm] 9 days...thank god thats all i have left..I need to get away so bad from everything and everyone..I mean things have been going okay, I just need a break from this routine and the constant repetition in my life. 9 days and I will be happy! post comment

[30 Jan 2005|12:59pm] Boys suck but that's nothing new Last night we had some people over I myself got quite drunk and had a good time...the beer bong is once again my best friend. I didnt really invite neone over but ashleigh did so I just had fun with everyone that came. I also made an appearance at the bar last night to see pauls brother, It was great to see him, but the rest of the situation was very ackward...he was ackward, he was different, i was slightly okay. I didnt stay I was strong only went for a half hour didnt drink or nething just stopped by talked for a few and left, I never leave, but everythings different and u know what Im glad I left. He acted like he cared that i was leaving and wanted me to stay then said he would probably see me next weekend...RIGHT!!!!!!!!!! O well I drank till about 4:30 in the morning it was a long night and i managed all of it on only 3 hours of sleep. O yea at 2 I called Tallen cuz i was bored he said he might come by but I knew he wouldnt. I talked to him at 3 he gave someone else the phone...way to avoid the situation when it was his idea in the first place for them to come over. THEIR FUCKING FRIEND STOPPED BY the one out the group that I dont talk to, he came over and hung out with me at like 3:30 and he said they were all tired and went home....awesome O well it was nice to have some company probably better company than I would of gotten from neone else. Today I think me and Ash are going out to eat just so we can talk and well we have no food lol. Then I have a lot of studying to do I have an accounting exam this week and I dont know how to do anything so it will be quite interesting. Well just thought I would update cause last night although at frist i was ranting about guys I ended up having a lot of fun just getting drunk in my kitchen with the ghetto beer bong and some friends!!!! post comment

[26 Jan 2005|12:05am] [ mood | content ] Well I never update anymore, I guess I just dont have the time nor do I make the time, plus I dont have anything of much interest to write about. My life has been consisting mainly of work and school, I'm beyond sick of it, but if I wasn't at work or school I would be doing nothing. I dont mind all the work I do, I like to keep busy, but every once in awhile it catches up with me and I feel like a need a break. Thankfully in 30 days I will be in CALIFORNIA which will be a very nice break from my busy schedule and the crappy weather. I wish I could go to California and stay there, at least for longer than 6 days, I need to get away from Michigan, I just kind of need to get away from everything. Leaving people behind is hard I know and right now theres too much going on in my life to leave, but one day hopefully not too far away I will take myself to the west coast and stay there. I just want to try life somewhere else, somewhere out of michigan, out of the cold. Okay other than wanting to run away to the coast, well I guess everything going on right now with friends, boys, and just life in general makes me want to run away. I'm sick of boys, esp. him. Well I'm done with him I had made the decision that if he came home and didnt call me I was done...well he didnt call me therefore I'm not putting in the effort anymore. I havent talked to him in almost a month now, I hate it, but I dont feel like wasting my time going back and forth with him nemore. We did that for a year, a year of getting no where, a year I wasted my time thinking everything between us would get figured out only to be once again let down. In that year I possibly could have found a better boy and gotten that one off my mind, but he was always in the back of my head, everytime we hung out and went back to our ways. I see now though that hes not really the type of person I want to be with, hes awesome to hang out with, but relationship wise I dont think it would work out all too well, so maybe its better that things ended nwo and we can be friends rather then us getting into a relationship only for it to not work out and possibly ruin the friendship that we have. So for as much as I was bothered by it for quite some time, I've come to be somewhat okay with it, I know things will be okay. Although I feel I am destined to be single, maybe one of these days Ill actually meet a good guy that wont stop talking to me after a month, who knows, I just know that Ive been trying not to think about it so much, its always in the back of my mind and every once in awhile I think about it, but I've been doing okay letting things figure themselves out. Okay now the friends thing, So I dont feel like I have that many anymore. I jsut need to go out and meet some new people get away from the people I used to hang out with because I realize alot of them are shady and only call me when they need something. Ive been trying to make an effort this semester to meet some people at school and I'm gonna stop blowing some people off and hang out with the people I havent relaly called in awhile, Ill put in some effort. Well wasnt supposed to be this long and I actually have more I could say now that I'm thinking about it, but I need to get some sleep. post comment

[08 Jan 2005|02:27pm] [ mood | content ] Things have been going along okay.. the holidays went by with no real problems well except me getting the flu but after a night of puking i was okay. New Years was alright, I'm just not meant to have an awesome new years eve because every year that I think something really cool is going on everything gets messed up but I still had fun. Well the Paul thing has gone no where...I only saw him a couple times over break which sucks, but kinda shows me what he thinks is important....THE BAR. O well I'm sure we will figure things out and if things dont go the way I want them to I will be okay...I mean everything with him has been going on for about a year now and we havent gotten too far so I dont know...one of these days we will figure it out. SOmetimes the things I do surprise me and make me laugh...Like last night, I cant really explain what I did cause its not something for everyone to know. Im just not sure how it happened, Im not upset it did, just kind of amused by it because I in no way expected that. School starts back up on tuesday not too excited for my 15 credits because they are all hard classes, looks like this semester I might have to put in some effort. But hey I didnt put in very much last semester and I pulled off a 3.20 bringing my overall up to a 3.1 Well Tonight Im not sure of my plans probably drinking with the girls over here or something because we all havent hung out in awhile... Just thought I would update a little cause its been quite some time, Ill have to work on doing this more often because its hard to update when I wait so long. post comment

[19 Dec 2004|12:38am] [ mood | pissed off ] Things just aren't meant to go correctly for me, esp. this weekend...I havent had a weekend like this in quite some time...and like before I dislike it very much. Last night sure me and Shannon had a good 2938749323498 hour talk....but we did ABSOLUTELY NOTHING! and then..........TONIGHT For the first time.........EVER........after the almost year of me going to Drinks Saloon with the boys...I GOT KICKED OUT at 10pm cuz im not 21 wtf I NEVER GET KICKED OUT...what's really gay about it is that our waitress was a girl I went to high school with....WHAT A FUCKING BITCH...she knew half the guys werent 21...but did they get kicked out....NOPE...JUST ME..and she didnt even do it herself she had some other bitch come kick me out........WTF...way to ruin my whole break....now I'll never see the boys...esp. that one in particular...............UGH IM FUCKING PISSED I ALWAYS HATED THAT BITCH NOW I REALLY DO...and I wasnt the only girl to get kicked out cause after i left I guess Natalie and some people went up there and the BITCH kicked them out too....WTF...nice way to ruin the place I'm used to hanging out at....... Now its fucking 12:42 and I did a whole lot of nothign tonight and Ashleigh and her boyfriend just went to bed and I'M NOT FUCKING TIRED nemore, so I get to hang out with myself cuz I HAVE NO FRIENDS ERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR 4 comments|post comment

[16 Dec 2004|07:40pm] eww I was just reading some past entries and well most of my most recent posts besides todays are depressing and make me appear to be a very depressed person when really I'm not, I need to work on appearing happier because even though I may not be 100% happy I'm not depressed! 1 comment|post comment

[16 Dec 2004|06:02pm] [ mood | content ] I havent updated in awhile and I'm bored at the moment so I might as well now. Things have been okay, not much has really changed. I no longer work at Gadzooks, I'm now at Forever 21, making more money and well the whole job is just much better, I'm happy I switched. School is almost done for the semester, only 1 more final. Today I had an awesome day, I did good on my final, got back my final comp. paper (93%) sold back a few books got $71, GOT PRESALE ASHLEE SIMPSON TICKETS :) main floor, march 24, very excited about that. I also finished my christmas shopping, well almost, and I went my work christmas party....Today has been VERY productive. This weekend I have no idea what's going on but I dont work very much so I'll definitely be out doing something, I'll probably hang out with the boys esp. since pauls been home for a week now and I havent even talked to him :( o well! Well thats enough I don't feel like explaining anything else, I'll update one of these days again. post comment

navigation [ viewing | most recent entries ] [ go | earlier ]